Love and relationship science, no sweeteners, plenty of moxie.
Relationship therapy for individuals, couples, & families.
What are you doing about growth?
“The most insightful and no nonsense counsellor I've ever encountered. You feel like she wants you to succeed so you don't need to keep seeing her, rather than to keep you coming back for months and months. If you're really committed to fixing your sh*t, she's the ticket.”
You’re here – that means you’re already ahead of the game. If something's missing in your relationship or you’d like to understand where a relationship went off-track, you're not alone. What sets you apart is that you've made the choice to make a change.
Click the button below to take the free online assessment.
How Can I Help?
Individual therapy
Family systems dynamics
Relationships
Sex addiction
Pornography use
Gender and sexuality
Urologic and gynaecological issues
Polyamory / open relationships / ethical non-monogamy
Queer relationships
COUPLES + relationship THERAPY
Relationship crisis
Conflict
Intimacy
Managing relationships outside the couple
Urologic and gynaecological issues
Infidelity + betrayal
Pornography use
Sex addiction
Differences in desire
Household management and relationship-work-life-balance
Love and sex after children
Gender and sexuality
Polyamory / open relationships/ ethical non-monogamy
Queer relationships
About Serafin
Serafin’s deep experience and qualifications are matched by her cutting-edge approach to therapy and coaching. She’s supportive and compassionate while getting to the heart of issues – which is why she can help fix things.
“Conflict is any experience of discomfort in one or both partners about the relationship - either in that moment or more enduringly” - Serafin Upton
Results-driven therapy and coaching
We’ll co-design your coaching or therapy so we quickly see what’s working, what isn’t and what to do next. This means you’re more likely to get wins faster and enjoy the process more.
Training from the world’s best
I’ve trained under two of the world’s most sought-after therapists, Terry Real and Esther Perel.
“Family dysfunction rolls down from generation to generation, like a fire in the woods, taking down everything in its path until one person in one generation has the courage to turn and face the flames. That person brings peace to their ancestors and spares the children that follow.” – Terry Real
VIRTUAL & INTENSIVE SESSIONS
Research shows virtual therapy is as effective as in-person while allowing far more flexibility. Intensive sessions and workshops happen in person.
neutrality-free individual & couples therapy
I ask questions, listen intently to your story, and share the truth about where things are going wrong. Then I give you the skills, strength, and support to make changes that will change the way you see yourself and your relationships forever.
What Clients Are Saying
“Serafin has helped me massively in such a short space of time. I went to her with a heavy heart and a busy mind, but she has since helped me see more clearly and think positively about my situation and life. I highly recommend her if you feel like you need help.”
— Simon - Wellington
“Serafin's approach felt highly professional, compassionate, and nuanced - she clearly has a gift for assessing a complex situation and then co-constructing strategies to manage it. Working with Serafin online was really effective and was way better than I thought it would be. Creating bookings and follow up communication with Serafin was a breeze.”
— Mark - Blenheim
“Serafin has been instrumental in helping me understand the key factors behind the breakdown of my marriage. Her targeted questions help to guide each session, getting to the crux of the issues at hand. Her insights are forthright and no-nonsense, yet are delivered with deep empathy and compassion. Each session with Serafin provides the opportunity for deeper personal understanding and self-development, paving the way to becoming the man I want to be.”
— Chris - Auckland
“I loved Serafin's frankness and kindness as she guided us through our own process of discovery. Serafin is skilled at listening to what is being said and also not said and 'takes sides' which in my experience therapists tend not to do. She did this with directness, compassion, and fairness (she took both sides throughout our work together) and it helped us to get clear about what was present in our relationship and needed to be worked through. The format and its intensity really worked well for us. The last thing we wanted was to be in therapy for months, and doing two intensive sessions scheduled around childcare was really effective.
Serafin, if you worked to improve something I think it would be communicating more clearly the role you play in facilitating a couple's process compared to the role you play as a therapist. From what I saw the facilitated process was a flexible space to move into embodiment and painful history while staying centered and a space that facilitated learning new ways of being together. I loved the way you guided and challenged me to see more clearly what was present and what could change. Thank you, Serafin.”
— Joe - Wellington
“I began seeing Serafin for issues I was having with anxiety, which was negatively impacting on my personal relationships and my studies. Through working with her I was able to identify the source of my anxiety and develop strategies to manage it. She also helped me to work through past trauma, and learn to be more comfortable and compassionate with myself. I feel like this was only possible because of the relationship and trust she built with me, through her gentle kindness and sense of humour. Overall, while beginning therapy was a daunting prospect, Serafin managed to make it seem easy by taking it one step at a time. I am so grateful to her for all her work, as she helped me get to a much happier and healthier place than I had ever been.”
— Charlotte - Auckland
“Serafin was great to work with. She is very personal in getting to know who you are as a person, and your story of how what you're struggling with came to be. She gets right to the heart of what's causing your struggles, allowing a personal understanding of why. Her recommendations have already helped improve the relationship between me and my wife, allowing us to forge a closer bond together. I would recommend Serafin to anybody needing relationship counselling or psychology. She is really wonderful.”
— David - Wellington
“Serafin is both professional and personable, she knows how to make difficult discussions easier! I don’t feel judged or guarded in our conversations. She always offers suggestions rather than ‘telling’ what could work which makes it much easier to consider and adopt her as ideas as well as pass them onto my partner.”
— Sienna - Wellington
